Echoes

So I have decided to change it up a bit and move my blog outside of myspace for the serious stuff. Check back to find my views on life and love and how I suck at both.

Until then, I thought I would start things off with a little bad poetry that I wrote back on 3 April 2007.

Echoes

Bouncing around inside my head like an old arcade game
Simple images go back and forth, slowly, repetitively - constantly.
An inner monologue that has taken off while my mouth is closed tight.

How tight and for how long?
The tapestry of my mind begins to look like one of those dot paintings
Cohesive from far away but a mess of small splotches of color up close.
48 hours of almost complete silence allow my inner voice (voices?) to wander.

Am I making the right choices with my life, am I doing the right thing?
Echoes of worries that never end; never go away.
Work, boys, friends, debt, sex, bills, love, money
A river of emotions each it's own ball bouncing off the walls of my mind.
Little pinging noises as they turn to go the other way like a swimmer doing laps.

I am an over-thinker
Silence does not bode well for those who tend to live in their minds.
Did I learn anything from The Yellow Wallpaper?
Those with too many thoughts need to find a medium to release them.
I am not seeing things in the wallpaper, there are no images creeping in the pattern.
I think things, wave upon wave of what ifs crash in to my mind.

Lady Macbeth cursed for the spots of blood on her hands to disappear.
Spots that only her mind could see, a way for her conscience to express its guilt.
Do I want these echoes gone?
Perhaps they build character, make me stronger.
Or they could be slowly eating away at my sanity, chunk by chunk taken away.

The echoes are a part of me - they are me.
Think happy thoughts and you will fly,
At least that is what Peter told the Darlings.
Think happy thoughts.
Happy thoughts think.
Think thoughts.
Happy.
Thoughts.

Thoughts echoing inside my head as I stay verbally reticent.
The echo is a silent scream.