As cliche as the saying is, everyone has their good days and bad days. And while I still am high strung and easily stressed out at the end of the day I am content. Not the type of contentment that is kin to settling for something less than you deserve just to have something but the contentment that is a cat curled up in the sun all nice and warm purring away. My sun is a brown-eyed man who blew in to my life and swept me off my feet before I knew what was happening.
My toxic family can still break my down to a sobbing mess but now I have a pair of strong arms to pick me up, be brutally honest in telling me how I need to not let their drama bother me (because he cars and doesn't want me to be hurt), and who will provide me a shoulder to cry on when I need it. I finally feel like there's someone in my corner, someone who wants to protect me and keep me from harm. After 28 years of fighting to put up sandbags around me to try and protect myself from the tsunami of emotional hell that is my relationship with my parents feeling so alone in the storm it's like a rescue line has finally been tossed to me. He might not understand what's going on or be able to sympathize with why their words and actions cause me to break down, but he's there for me and that's all I need.
I'm finally really, truly, happy. It's such a foreign feeling but a welcome one.
I can honestly see myself building a life with this man and being happy to wake up next to him every morning until I take my last breath in this lifetime. It's an utterly terrifying and yet completely exciting feeling.
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